Exit 9B Remade
by RegularShowMemorabilia
Summary: This is how I wanted Exit 9B to play out, this episode is wholy based on the episode of regular show called "Exit 9B" Regular show belongs to J.G. Quintel and not me, (Obviously.) Warning Extreme episode references may occur. Rated K.
1. Chapter One: The Beginning

EXIT 9B

It was a peaceful day in the park, the birds were singing, the wind was blowing, and the sun was shining. Just then, a goat appeared at the front door of the house and knocked, after not getting an answer he peered through one of the windows and peeked inside. "Hello?" He asked. He continued knocking as he opened the door. "Benson, hello?" He called. "Is anybody here?" He continued to call. The goat walked inside the house, just as his cell-phone began to ring. He stood next to a dresser, with pictures of all the park workers above it and answered his phone.

"Hey Mom, yeah it's my first day at my new internship…no I'm looking for them right now…yeah…yeah I met everybody yesterday, they all seem really cool…yeah it's gonna be a really easy way to get free credits…" The goat talked over the phone, before he was interrupted by an explosion outside, the explosion rocked the house, the goat began to panic.

"Mom hold on!" The goat shouted, hanging up his phone. He ran to the front door and slammed it open, he was shocked, as he saw several explosions outside the house, red auras came out of nowhere, and the goat was being shot at! The goat covered his face and jumped behind the railing of the house's porch, shielding himself from the shots. A few seconds later, a large headed man, a gumball machine and a ghost with a hand above his head came running towards the house.

"Run! Run!" The gumball machine screamed. The three of them groaned as they tried to escape from their attacker. After a few seconds, the ghost was shot down and crashed into the ground. The big-headed man and the gumball machine kept running, but looked behind in fear. Then the gumball machine was shot in the head by one of the lasers, knocking him over onto the ground, grinding against the ground as he fell. "Benson!" The giant-headed man shouted. The goat peered from behind the porch's railing and watched in fear as he saw the big-headed mean get shot in the head, his eyes rolling back into his head, eventually falling down.

Then he noticed a giant yeti approaching, trying to escape the lasers, the yeti jumped over a small brick retaining wall and did a small front flip to dodge one of the lasers. As the attacker came closer into view, the goat jumped over the railing and into the bushes next to the house, to hide from the attacker, he ran. A few seconds later, one of the lasers clipped one of the yeti's foot and knocked him over. The Yeti groaned, as he turned towards his attacker and spoke; "You…you won't get away with…ah…" The yeti said, as he was zapped with the laser gun from the attacker.

Nearby a zombie was hiding behind a garbage bin, trying to hide from the attacker. He breathed heavily and then saw his chance to escape, he ran away from the bin screaming, though unfortunately the attacker noticed him immediately and shot him in the head with his laser gun, causing the zombie to collapse and go unconscious. As the attacker came closer, a blue Jay and a small raccoon were running for their lives. "Dude Hurry!" The raccoon shouted. "I'm trying!" The blue jay screamed.

The Blue Jay was carrying a time machine, which he had used a couple of days ago to make sure a bad kiss never happened. [Episode: Bad Kiss], while the raccoon was carrying some sort of document. When unfortunately the attacker shot the blue jay in the leg, just as he adjusted the time machine to work, landing in the raccoons hands. The blue jay was shot in the head with the laser, knocking him unconscious. "Mordecai! No!" The raccoon screamed. Just as the attacker was gonna take care of his last victim, the time machine blinked and the raccoon disappeared in a giant green aura.

As the attacker came into view, it was noted that he was wearing a red tie and a formal outfit, he had a giant beard and a pair of sunglasses on, he said; "Ha, you should have sold it to me when you had the chance." Picking up a hand-held explosion controlling device from his pocket, he stretched the antenna of the device and pressed a button, causing the house to exploded and crumble to the ground. And a giant red swirling portal appearing from nowhere. The man let out an evil laugh as the goat watched from behind a nearby park bench in fear, trying to hold back tears. His fellow co-workers gone. He just sat in shock, looking at all his 'presumed dead' friends, with a depressed expression on his face.


	2. Chapter Two: New Indentities

_Two Months Later_

Two months after the attack on the staff of the park. All the park members were brainwashed and all their real memories were replaced with fake ones. The blue jay, (Mordecai) began working at "Movie Shack Hut", The Yeti, (Skips) started his own mechanic shop by the name of; "Skip's Place. Body. Oil. Transmission." The Big-headed man, (Pops) got a job at the town's butterfly sanctuary. The Zombie, (Muscle Man) got a job as a university professor, the gumball machine, (Benson) kept his job at the park, but had his mind brainwashed aswell. The ghost, (High-Five-Ghost) began to work at a pizza place in town. And the goat, (Thomas) was the only one who didn't get brainwashed. He kept his internship at the park because he needed the credits for school.

At Mordecai's Job, he just rested on the counter, looking at some movies he had stacked in a pile. One of them being a movie called; "Planet Chasers Starlight Excellent." [Episode: Brain Eraser]. Skips was working in his new shop, he came into a waiting room and called; "Let's see…Pops! We got a pops here?" He asked, scanning the room. Soon someone replied, it was Pops, who was reading Moustache Monthly. [Episode: Brain Eraser]. "Huh?" Pops exclaimed. "You Pops?" Skips asked.

"Indeed." Pops replied, dropping his magazine. "Cars ready, sign here." Skips replied, holding a cork board in his hand, and passed Pops a pen. Pops signed the cork board and asked; "I hope she wasn't any trouble mister…mister…Skips." Pops read Skip's name tag. "Not really, just an oil change." Skips replied. "Oh splendid!" Pops laughed, running over to his old-fashioned car. "We got a Marcy Stevenson here?" Skips asked.

Pops started his car and reversed out of the garage and drove down the street. He turned on his radio and put on some old-fashioned tunes which he clicked his fingers to. Meanwhile, a little further down the street, Muscle Man was dressed formally as a professor and waited at a traffic light. "Come on." He groaned, looking at his watch and tapping his foot. The traffic light went green and Muscle Man began to cross the street, but then Pops came down the street not looking and drove towards Muscle Man.

Muscle Man screamed, which alerted Pops, Pops screamed too, he pushed down on the brake pedal of the car as hard as he could, stopping just before Muscle Man. "What the heck old man!?" He exclaimed, smashing his fist onto the car's hood. Pops reversed the car and began to drive away, Muscle Man threw his suitcase at the car as it disappeared around a corner. "Sorry!" He exclaimed. "Hey! I'll find out who you are!" Muscle Man shouted. A few seconds later Muscle Man bumped into HFG, who was carrying two pizzas with his hand.

"Hey mister, do you know the way to the park?" HFG asked. "Uh, HELLO!? I almost died! Besides I don't have time to tell you, I'm late for my lecture on quantum mechanics." Muscle man replied, walking off. "Pfft, brainiac." HFG muttered to himself. Turning around and looking at a sign which read; "Old Town" above the place; "The Park". HFG followed the sign to the park and knocked at the wooden door.

Benson opened the door and said; "Hey, you're not the usual pizza guy." "I'm new! That'll be $12.95." HFG replied, after Benson paid HFG he grabbed the pizzas and ran past one of the construction sites for Exit 9B, the new highway being built over the ruins of the park. "The Pizzas have arrived sir." Benson said, talking to the very same man who brainwashed him, his new boss.

He was looking over a map with another construction worker, he dismissed him and said; "Excellent." As he walked turned around and continued talking; "Thomas! Come!" He demanded. Thomas took off his headphones and turned off the music he was listening to and ran over to the bearded man. Thomas took the pizza out of Benson's hands and walked over to the bearded man. "Sir, do you think _I_ could have some pizza?" Benson asked. "What!? Pizzas are for winners, you're not a winner Benson you're a slacker, NOW GET BACK TO WORK!" The man demanded. "Yes sir." Benson replied. "Intern! Pizza!" The man demanded. Thomas was forced to feed the man like a baby. After the man consumed some pizza he let out an evil laugh, while Thomas just stood there, with an angry look on his face.

Close by, a green aura came out of nowhere and a small raccoon landed on the ground. "Oh….my…back…" The raccoon complained. The raccoon got up and noticed he had accidently crushed the time machine due to landing on it. "Damn! The time machine is busted!" He spoke to himself. "Wait, Mordecai?" Rigby exclaimed. He was in a panic, he didn't know what to do without Mordecai. He soon remembered that Mordecai was shot in the head.

Rigby thought his best friend was dead, he looked up and noticed that people were coming, he hid behind a dump truck and looked at his hands, and he was holding a document, the answer to all the problems. "Mordecai can't be dead…maybe I could find Skips. Maybe he could help." Rigby spoke to himself. Rigby ran off and ran to where Skips used to live and noticed that his house was covered in black crosses. He knew Skips wasn't there after looking around.

He looked down for a second and noticed a small business card on the ground, it read; "Skip's Place." Rigby exclaimed; "Hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm." As he ran off to Skip's place. After a few minutes he arrived and saw someone working on a car. "Hey, dude, know where I could find Skips?" Rigby asked. As the man came out from under the car he was working on, Rigby immediately noticed that it was Skips. "I'm Skips, who's asking?" Skips asked. "Skips!" Rigby exclaimed.

"Yeah, what do you want?" Skips asked. "Dude, don't you recognize me? It's me Rigby!" Rigby shouted. "I don't know you." Skips replied. _"I think he's been brainwashed."_ Rigby thought to himself. "Remember? We were co-workers at the park!" Rigby exclaimed. "Eh…I never worked at any park." Skips replied, walking towards a desk with tools on it. "Do you remember that evil bearded guy then? He must have scrambled your brain, he was scramble my brain too, but I escaped through a hole in space time." Rigby replied, imitating laser and explosion noises.

"I think about two months has passed since then, now he's building a freeway on the park! Our park! You gotta help me stop him!" Rigby shouted. Skips reached into a filing cabinet and studied some nuts and bolts. "Exit 9B is gonna make a huge difference in people's lives. How else are people gonna get from south I85 to south west 85B? If you need some help with your car, I'm your guy, otherwise, get out of here." Skips replied.

"That's not the Skips I know!" Rigby exclaimed. "I don't know you!" Skips got in Rigby's face. "Skips, you're in there somewhere, snap out of it!" Rigby shouted, slapping Skips across the face, BIG MISTAKE. Skips roared, then picked Rigby up by the throat and pulled him against the wall, choking him.

"What's your game?" Skips asked. "You gotta remember, Skips!" Rigby pleaded. "Who do you work for?!" Skips demanded an answer. "Well, technically your one of our bosses…" Rigby replied. "You lie…" Skips replied. "Wait!" Rigby exclaimed. "We know why your name is Skips! Remember the only women you ever loved!?" Rigby exclaimed, gasping for air. That one sentence passed into Skips head like a bowling ball hitting all ten pins.

Skips immediately remembers the past, He remembers the flashback about the only women he ever loved. [Episode: Diary]. And when Mordecai and Rigby sent him to the moon [Episode: The Power] and also when Mordecai, Pops, Rigby and himself were laughing at the kitchen table. [Various Episodes].

And when Skips offered his guitar to help them defeat the Summer-time lovin' song. [Episode this is my Jam], Skips having fun with the rest of the guys at McHooligans. [Episode: Over the Top] and last but not least, Skips, Mordecai, Rigby and Benson defeating the Magical Elements and winning a gold trophy for winning a bowling tournament. Skips fazed back to reality and noticed what he was doing.

He let go of Rigby's neck and held his head as he lent against a nearby table, panting and moaning. (This was a lot of stuff to comprehend). Rigby gasped for air and spoke to skips; "Skips…?" Rigby asked. "Tell me everything." Skips demanded. That night, Rigby was almost finished explaining what happened. "…And that bearded guy tried to buy the park out for months, but then he took it by force and we need your help to get it back!" Rigby explained.

"What can we do?" Skips asked. "Look at this." Rigby passed over the document he was holding to Skips. Skips read it. "It declares the Park a 'historical landmark', we just need everyone who worked at the park to sign it and then it will be illegal to build Exit 9B. DECLARED FROM CITY HALL, YO!" Rigby exclaimed.

"That's easier said than done." Skips replied. "Yeah…" Rigby replied back. "Well if that bearded guy gave ME a new identity, then there's no TELLING where everyone else is!" Skips exclaimed. "I think I know where we can find out." Rigby smiled. A few minutes later, Rigby and Skips were hiding behind a pile of trash near the bearded man's trailer, (where he lived). "Get down." Skips demanded, hiding below the trash with Rigby to avoid being seen. "Let's go." Skips continued. Rigby and Skips ran over to the trailer.

Skips pulled a screwdriver from his pocket and picked the lock on the door, opening it and shutting it behind him as they entered the trailer. "Okay, we're looking for a book which contains everyone's new identities, let's look around for it." Skips said. "Alright." Rigby replied, going through the bearded man's desk. "Hey is this it?" Rigby asked, pulling out a small scrap book from the desk. Skips had a close look at it and read each of the new identities of the park workers and their new jobs.

"Okay, Mordecai's working at Movie Shack Hut, Pops is working at the butterfly sanctuary, Muscle Man is a university professor, HFG is a pizza delivery guy and Thomas and Benson still work at the park." Skips explained. "Okay, we got it, let's go!" Rigby exclaimed, but just before they were about to leave they noticed the handle turning on the door. "Benson, I thought you said you locked this!?" A voice exclaimed.

"But…I did lock it…" Benson replied. "Oh you did? I guess that's why the handle's turning…" The voice continued. Skips grabbed Rigby and they hid in a nearby closet, keeping it a creek open to see what was going on in the trailer. "…And I suppose if I push it open it won't open huh? Well what do you know you forgot to lock it!" The bearded man exclaimed. "I could of sworn I locked it! I'm sorry, sir, it won't happen again." Benson replied.

"Next time it happens you're fired." The man replied. "Thomas, get me some coffee." The man continued, Thomas grabbed some coffee and handed it to the man; "I'm pretty sure I saw him lock it…" Thomas said. "Nobody asked you Thomas! I could fire you any time I want, just like I can fire Benson anytime I want, isn't that right Benson?" The man teased Benson. Then suddenly turned towards the closet and asked; "Why is that open?" "He knows!" Rigby quietly whispered, Skips covered Rigby's mouth. The man got closer and closer until he was a finger-span from the door, this was it! They were goners for sure!


End file.
